looking through some old pics, I saw this one of me, obviously in a deeply contemplative mood, probably wondering if god really exists or something... who knows




"Oh for a faith that will not shrink"... ella's a staunch baptist, she was goin nuts over the baby in the manger, and i think she was chewing on Mary's head too.

peace

awsome weekend.
So we left for pittsburgh at six thirty and got there at like eleven. Thing is rosina kept saying "we're almost there" and we never got there.... till like a half hour later. so that was weird. we partied at nelson and vanessa's house that night till like one oclock, then went to harlans, where i slept.
then saturday cart and erica and lori or lindsey (i get em mixed up lol) and I went shopping and i got an eagles CD and a johnny cash CD for dirt cheap, which i somthin i like. everbody had clearance sales so it was cool.
Oh yeah and there is this awsome store out there called guitar center. So carson had the guts to ask if we can just play and the guy was like "yeah sure man waddya need?" So he ripped a les paul off the wall and we were playing for a while. oh yeah and we played a bass to. lets start a band. :D
so then we played voleyball, (well sorta, it was kind of a flop cuz noone felt like playing) and we hung out at nelson and vanessa's again and watched alvin and the chipmucnks. lolololol.
Then we went to church, ate lunch and came home.
mebbe vannessa will post pics, i dunno. but i didnt take any.

ttyl,
conrad

A quote i found while surfing comments on a CNN news story.

"Let me tell you how this fake holiday is a great excuse to get drunk and forget about our problems. Yay!!! lets celebrate Jesus, when we are so far from Him, on a day He was never born, and do all the things He is against. … WHAT A HOLIDAY…!!!!!"

wowie. this guy has a point

Just keep running
You'll forget all your problems when your falling through the air.
Walk into the dragons mouth, pretend theres nothing there.
Don't look up, shut your eyes.
The Eagle's dropping from the sky
Hung up on his own yard arm
There is reason for alarm.
Just keep running.

This is a post dedicated to my feathered friends... enjoy!! click on the pic to enlarge it.)

this is some kind of wild bird.... beautiful beautiful. anyway it was sitting on annies porch and i walked up to it and i got it to perch on my finger, then on my shoulder, and it eventually flew off.

robin in our yard

"bug off short stuff!"

homing pijjies
more homing pigeons

the doves... gotta love these guys. I got within touching distance of this one. she is sitting on two babies in this pic. Doves are awsome. I already crawled up a tree and petted one on the back for several minutes before she knew what was up. There very trusting, and you can go within touching distance in a matter of ten minutes. really fun. obtw this is what i do when the rest of you guys are out there shooting them. :D. I dont shoot doves. squirrels, rabbits, deer, sure. but not doves.

alright ttyl guys, i needa get back to my schoolwork.
conrad

what i do in church.... i have some ppl concerned for my soul so let me know what you think

You saw him standing in the shelter of a church
His mind is dancing with the demons... watch his lurch
The priests inside
dont really mind
just so he stays out of their castle
They chant an ave so god cant wrestle
with their minds
just watch him die.

we are American.
We can rape the world without a reason why
Just keep this to yourself and by and by
Everyone
Will be one
With our dreams of total world control
Selfdestructive monsters, on we roll
just let me go.
and let them try
to make the life they want
To us they arent worth anything
If they cant help us do our thing
so help them god.

this is soooo good

enjoy

seen on a billboard...

"get peace of mind: get life insurance."

god i wish it were that easy

Frail Grasp on the Big Picture

These are some of the lyrics from a song by the seventies rock band Eagles.

Well, ain't it a shame
That our short little memories
Never seem to learn
The message of history
We keep makin' the same mistakes
Over and over and over and over again
And then we wonder why
We're in the shape we're in

Frail grasp on the big picture
Light fading and the fog is getting thicker
It's a frail grasp on the big picture
Dark ages

And we pray to our Lord
Who we know is American
He reigns from on high
He speaks to us through middlemen
And he shepherds his flock
We sing out and we praise His name
He supports us in war
He presides over football games
And the right will prevail
All our troubles shall be resolved
We have faith in the Lord

Frail grasp on the big picture
It's a frail grasp on the big picture
Heaven help us

random pics

my guitar... if anyone has name suggestions let me know...

LOL!!! this is a pic in a presbyterian graveyard. Aint it great folks?! God bless America.

So Pequea Homeschoolers "forgot" to include me on a quiz team. So that stinx. So I'm lookin for ppl to create a quiz team. crazy I know. lord its almost december but I've been studying so i dont want it to go for nothing. so yeah if anyone out there feels like it, email me or whatever.

later
cornad

Ok. wow that was an awsome weekend
Saturday at like eleven in the morning me an caleb went to juniata county. We were hanging out at my cool cuzin Veronica's house and took her to Bullride Mania in Harrisburg and went out to eat an all that. so we were having a good time watchin ppl get gored by bulls and idiot clowns doing weird skits and there was barrel racing and bronc riding and the works. And for you country music freaks, i saw steve holly. but it really wasnt that great. like as soon as the doors were open ppl came rushing down. so they could be way in front and touch him. so dum. i couldnt even understand the words and it was so loud it made my liver shiver. so we just left.

I was so mad. At the beginning of the show I saw this crazy looking amish dude with black leather jacket and ripped up jeans and a cowboy hat. I was kinda ticked cuz he looked like a druggie. and then bout half way through the show I look down and he was drunk as a coon, bobbing his head around and yelling like an idiot. and his poor girl. she was probably mortified! I and she's not going to tell someone she wants a ride home cuz her boy is drunk. I was so mad. so mad. so mad. I mean for cryin out loud!! and there was tons of amish dudes there with beers and amish girls all done up it was so sick i could have cried. I wanted to hide my face. Like everybodys gonna think that amish and mennonites are a bunch of idiots. and some are, but alot of us aren't. Dont they think??!! Dont they know what they're doing to the ppl around them?!! yeah and you could always pick them out. always. i dunno what it was. but i was so mad that night. so i just shut myself down and tried to enjoy the show.
So yeah then we got to my cousins house again at 12 in the night. and then we stayed up till three talking. something about that time of night is just insane. I mean you say stuff that you would never say if you were in proper control of your facilities. so that was awsome. lol.
and i bought two really cool Eagle's cds (no no not the football team, its a band) at walmart for cheap. And im leaving you with one of their songs called the Long Road out of Eden. Its like ten minutes long but its really really awsome

Moon shining down through the palms
shadows moving on the sand
somebody whispering the twenty-third psalm
dusty rifle in his trembling hands

somebody trying just to stay alive
he got promises to keep
over the ocean in america
far away and fast asleep

silent stars blinking in the blackness of an endless sky
cold silver satellites, ghostly caravans passing by
galaxies unfolding, new worlds being born
pilgrims and prodigals creeping toward the dawn
but it's a long road out of eden

music blasting from an suv
on a bright and sunny day
rolling down the interstate
in the good ol' usa

having lunch at the petroleum club
smokin' fine cigars and swappin' lives
he said: "gimme 'nother slice o' that barbecued brisket!"
"gimme ‘nother piece o' that pecan pie!"

freeways flickering, cell phones chiming a tune
we're riding to utopia, road map says we'll be arriving soon
captains of the old order clinging to the reins
assuring us these aches inside are only growing pains
but it's a long road out of eden

back home i was so certain
the path was very clear
but now i have to wonder: “what are we doing here?”
I'm not counting on tomorrow
and i can't tell wrong from right
but i'd give anything to be there in your arms tonight

weaving down the american highway
through the litter and the wreckage and the cultural junk
bloated with entitlement, loaded on propaganda
and now we're driving dazed and drunk

been down the road to damascus,
the road to mandalay
met the ghost of caesar on the appian way
he said, "it's hard to stop this bingeing, once you get a taste."
"but the road to empire is a bloody stupid waste."

behold the bitten apple - the power of the tools
but all the knowledge in the world is of no use to fools
and it's a long road out of eden....

amen brothers!!

wow that was a long post. so ttyl
conrad

"So hit me with music"

-Bob Marley

Tell me I'm an orphan in the presence of my father
Wash me in an ocean full of blood and dirty water
So scare me into heaven
You take away my breath
At least eternal prayer wont hurt
Like never ending death

So scare me into heaven

ok so i havent posted in a long long time. life is busy. so last week i went to market three days and this week i go to market three days. so yeah. and next weekend im gonna go to the farm show complex to watch some bull riding and stay at my cousins place for the weekend. oh yeah.
and jet and pop are in australia now which is really awsome.
i havent been feeling very inspired lately... its cuz im too busy.

cya later,
conrad

jack handy

i really get a kick out of this guy. check it out. Deep thoughts from jack handy.


"Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant, and she fell on me. Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny."
If you work on a lobster boat, sneaking up behind someone and pinching him is probably a joke that gets old real fast."

"It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man."

"If I was the head of a country that lost a war, and I had to sign a peace treaty, just as I was signing I'd glance over the treaty and then suddenly act surprised. 'Wait a minute! I thought WE won!'"

LOLOLOL.

the shadow of me and my guitar in a parking lot

lily

all right boys and girls!!! conrad just finished his business math for ninth grade. I did twelve lessons today so i wouldnt have to finish it on monday. and this is soooo awsome. I got an A on my test so that was doublely awsome. SCOOOORE!!!! so now i have to do biology with this cranky miss stancil for a teacher. and everbody who has had her knows that you cant listen to her voice for more than 5 minutes straight without needing psycholgical rehabilitation. bad news. I might get some pics of her, because i pause the video at times when she looks the funniest, and take great pix. it is very entertaining. :D

and yesterday i went to market. Th phillies also had their victory celebration which means little kids with big bottles of whiskey roaming the street, and old men with pitchers of beer, slobbering over the bar tables and trashing up the city. I work right across from a bar so thats pretty cool. ya know drunkies makin up crazy songs and cheering like crazy and enjoying life. philly is nasty for that kind of stuff. its really disguisting.
It made me think of the song "Good morning America! How are you?"
poor drunk and angry is how we are. more on that later.

ok enjoy life folks,
conrad

The moon looks down. I watch
The demons playing cards with me, my heart
Deciding who should claim my soul.
Apart
From thought and pain
I know the force is guiding me and then
I throw the queen of spades
To the one with bloodshot eyes and hear his moan
Again
He’s raging now
He knows that he’s been beat and lost
My soul again
To the man with scars that mark his hands
And tearing up his side. He's won
Through me
The power of the light it throbs again
I throw the bottle back
Into his twisted face. It breaks and tears
The flesh of pride and hate. And then he turns
And flees
Away into the night on broken glass.
On broken glass.

Imagine... by Paul Mccarthy

Imagine there's no heaven

It's easy if you try

No hell below us

Above us only sky

Imagine all the people

Living for today...

Imagine there's no countries

It isn't hard to do

Nothing to kill or die for

And no religion too

Imagine all the people

Living life in peace...

You may say I'm a dreamer

But I'm not the only one

I hope someday you'll join us

And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions

I wonder if you can

No need for greed or hunger

A brotherhood of man

Imagine all the people

Sharing all the world...

You may say I'm a dreamer

But I'm not the only one

I hope someday you'll join us

And the world will live as one

fall

“Yo! Did you have lunch yet?” I looked down upon the wizened old frame quickly rising to his feet. He hadn’t shaved for days. He wore his coat inside out. He was hungry. He hurried to keep up with my brisk pace. “Me and you are going to go get us some lunch,” I told him. I slowed down as he asked me again where we were going.
“The Reading Terminal. They have good stuff to eat there.” I was talking about the farmers market. He was thinking of the train station.
“You takin’ me somewhere?” he mumbled, still thinking we were going to the train station.
“No, no, man. We are going to go get you some lunch.” I replied.
“O, ok.” He followed me obediently down the street. When we reached the back entrance of the market, the guard looked into my face, recognizing me and waving me through, but he tried to block the old man. My new friend simply pointed at my back and kept walking. The guard let him pass, reluctantly. We went inside and he came close to my side so that I could hear his voice above the hubbub. I told him that I usually get seafood soup and a loaf of bread. “No, no. I need something solid. If its no trouble to you I think I am gonna git something off of that recipe.” He was referring to a menu board. His mind was obviously not what it used to be. “I think I want the roast pork.” He decided. I handed him a ten dollar bill and went to get my soup. I came back and it was his turn to order. “Give me the roast pork sandwich and a small coke please!” he yelled. He turned to me. “Are you a Roman Catholic?”
“No,” I replied.
“Are you a Christian?”
“No,” I stated. “I’m just a follower of Christ.”
He smiled and cracked a joke.
“Ok I think I am going to go now,” I said, and told him where I worked and that he could keep the change from lunch and buy supper with it. He was pleased.
I met him later that day while at work. “What’s up?” I inquired.
He went straight to the point. “Man, I don’t want you to think that I’m always a bum, but I was wondering if you know of any place I could sleep tonight. See I don’t have anywhere to sleep, and I decided to ask you. You are the first friend I ever had.”


“How can I worship a homeless man on Sunday and ignore one on Monday?”

founds some cool pics i took awhile ago while strolling through my files. this was when i had just discovered the joys of manual focus and taking pictures of water droplets. The lilies were gorgeous after the rain so i got a few pics of them

more snakey pics

it was wrapped around my hands here so i had to crop it... i dunno if i like it yet or not.

i like this one

maybe this is the best one.... the fire looks awsome


later,
conrad

 

its the kind of picture that inspires dark poetry... which is why i didnt publish any of it.


I found a garter snake in the tea patch. It was pretty awsome cuz I was freakin out little amish kids and daring them to touch it. o yeah. and mom screamed. "get that thing out of my house. NOW!" lol it was funny. anyway i decided to go on a little fotoshoot with "ollie" as i dubbed him. the sunset was kinda cool so i did the sillhouette thing with it. I wanted to get it wrapped around a cross and have the campfire in the back but that would have looke a little touched so i decided not to. I have a couple of other pics i might post later, but this one is definitely the bestest. I softened it up since it wasnt the clearest anyway cuz it was the squirmiest little thing. It felt really cool when it moved in your hands. but thats another story.

later folks,
conrad
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To find your god
You'll see him staggering through the crowd
Beneath his mindless drunken shrowd
You'll find a king

To save your god
A woman sobbing as you pass
This chance you have may be the last
To meet the king

To love your god
A silhouette against the sky
He bows his ragged head to cry
god save the king.

The sky is dark
And moonlight shimmers down like demons breath.
I see the night is threatning me with death
Beneath the stars

she cries. I ask her why, and stoop, but rise

to face the fire and hail that blinds her moonstruck eyes

I touch her trembling hand And say,

"Your cries are heard

so face the light and know You have to fight

To serve the crazy god of love and light

your mind will see

That steel is strengthened in the flame and that

the sun must bleed so that moon and stars remain
I know the rose

Is grey at night because its fast asleep

Your god will hear your prayer and he will weep"

and god will weep

Your voice upon a stormy sea
Is calmly calling out to me
And all is well

Unreachable though it may be
To dream of it will set me free
Until tomorrow

Moonlight dancing on your face
The shadows fly without a trace
Left behind.

* * * *

Tanglewood
Running from the light
I wonder if I’m right
But I can’t tell.

What’s in a name.
I ask who’s got the keys
I’m falling on my knees
And asking

Can they come in.
We fight the light they see
So could we really be
Selfdestructive.
* * * *
Whistle through the willows.
Dance among the trees
Wave in rhythm with the grass
In a summer breeze.

Wrap the icy river
In your warm embrace
Feel your power on the wind
Blowing in my face

Billow in my sails
Give me wings to fly
Through the realm of twisted light
To reach into the sky.

Open up my mind
Searching the unknown.
Give me power of your light
Before the thunder’s grown

Find your rainbows end and
Seek what no one sees.
Singing with angel’s voices
Carried in the breeze.

javier... wow he went a little far didnt he? lol

shnitzel... closeup

one of caleb's bulldog pups

this morning... sunspot on the road in front of our house

little guy I was hanging out with last night.... not a really breathtaking pic but whatever

some pics of the hillbilly social we had in our barn. this is jet

jamien

Never
Your life to me is worth much more
You stagger through the closing door
And call for help

Fight
Your hopeless godforsaken dreams
Are more beneath than what it seems
To those around.

Alone.
Crying in the darkness of the street
Cry to your god but rise to your feet
Again victorious.